March 11, 2013

Gob: Speech, speech, speech!

All: Speech, speech, speech, speech, speech, speech, speech, speech, speech, speech, speech…

Narrator: The family continued to chant “speech, speech, speech” for no one in particular.

All: …speech, speech, speech!

Michael: Gee, after all that, I was kind of hoping somebody would make a speech.

Buster: Speech, speech, speech!

Michael: All right, I’ll say something.

Gob: Typical.

March 7, 2013
Lucille: Did he say that? Did he say that he misses me? Does he need his wife’s embrace?
George Sr: Daddy horny, Michael.
Michael: He said some wonderful things.

Lucille: Did he say that? Did he say that he misses me? Does he need his wife’s embrace?

George Sr: Daddy horny, Michael.

Michael: He said some wonderful things.

March 5, 2013
[Lindsay tries to cry.]
Michael: Seriously, you’re going to pull a muscle.
Lindsay: I used to be able to do this.

[Lindsay tries to cry.]

Michael: Seriously, you’re going to pull a muscle.

Lindsay: I used to be able to do this.

February 27, 2013
Lucille: She’ll sell the company, or break it up into little parts or something, all under the guise of “caring” about our family.
Michael: You’ve got to stop quoting when you drink.

Lucille: She’ll sell the company, or break it up into little parts or something, all under the guise of “caring” about our family.

Michael: You’ve got to stop quoting when you drink.

January 31, 2013
Michael: Call me what you want…
Lindsay: An impotent man-boy.

Michael: Call me what you want…

Lindsay: An impotent man-boy.

January 21, 2013
Michael: Did I just wake you up? I didn’t even know you were home.
Lindsay: No, Michael, I don’t just sleep all day.
Narrator: Actually, Lindsay was so upset at Michael that she tried meditating to calm herself but ended up taking a two-hour angry nap.

Michael: Did I just wake you up? I didn’t even know you were home.

Lindsay: No, Michael, I don’t just sleep all day.

Narrator: Actually, Lindsay was so upset at Michael that she tried meditating to calm herself but ended up taking a two-hour angry nap.

January 17, 2013
Michael: Okay, we’ve all made some sacrifices to be here, but we all want the same thing.
Oscar: I want to live here.
George Michael: I want to buy Ann some diamond dust.
Buster: I’m just hoping to get mildly injured so I can get out of the Army.
Michael: Bottom line is, we’ve got two weeks to build a house. Doesn’t have to be good; just has to look good.
Tom Jane: I just want my kids back.

Michael: Okay, we’ve all made some sacrifices to be here, but we all want the same thing.

Oscar: I want to live here.

George Michael: I want to buy Ann some diamond dust.

Buster: I’m just hoping to get mildly injured so I can get out of the Army.

Michael: Bottom line is, we’ve got two weeks to build a house. Doesn’t have to be good; just has to look good.

Tom Jane: I just want my kids back.

January 7, 2013
Kitty: So take a good look, ‘cause it’s the last time!
Michael: That’s like the seventh nipple I’ve seen today.

Kitty: So take a good look, ‘cause it’s the last time!

Michael: That’s like the seventh nipple I’ve seen today.

January 6, 2013
Gob: I told you to walk away. I told you to use a fake name.
Michael: I did. Thanks very much. I’m Chareth Cutestory, a pirate lawyer. It was airtight.

Gob: I told you to walk away. I told you to use a fake name.

Michael: I did. Thanks very much. I’m Chareth Cutestory, a pirate lawyer. It was airtight.

January 6, 2013
Young Michael: You’re a crook, Captain Hook.

Young Michael: You’re a crook, Captain Hook.